Sometimes the hardest thing about writing is that there’s too much, instead of too little, to write about. The last few days have been eventful, and the cause of the commotion is the same as it was a few days ago. We’re not sure why, but Bowen has started throwing up more frequently again. Sarah and I have lost a lot of sleep from jumping out of bed a couple times per hour to help him. Sometimes it’s a false alarm, but most of the time we end up changing his clothes and cleaning him up. Poor little guy, my heart just breaks for him. I keep thinking, “If I have to watch this poor kid throw up one more time…” There’s really no resolution to that statement, except for that I’ll have to watch him throw up again, and God will give me the grace to do so.
This morning we removed Bowen’s ng tube for a while because we felt that it was irritating his throat and causing him to gag more often. Sure enough, he did way better without it, but we could only leave it out for so long. Due to his hyperinsulinism, his blood sugar drops when he’s not on his continuous feeding cycle. When I went to put his ng tube back in, I met a lot of resistance. I tried four times and still had no luck. At that point, from exhaustion, Sarah hit a breaking point and began to sob. All the while, we were late for administering his meds and his sugars were getting into the 80’s. Even with Bowen and Sarah both extremely upset, I knew I had to get his tube in. We set him on the couch, and with prayers and a plan I was able to get it in. Sarah and I smiled at each other and yelled “Yes!” As she jumped toward me to give me a hug, my hand caught his tube and began to yank it back it out of his nose! Somehow Sarah saw what was happening and quickly responded. Thankfully, she caught it before it came out. Once we had it back in place, we looked at each other with relief in our eyes and both burst into laughter.
I love that feeling, when tension breaks and, by the grace of God, turns into laughter.
If you don’t use Twitter, you should consider it. One of the reasons I enjoy Twitter is because it forces me to take my thoughts and compact them into 140 characters or less. In other words, it helps me to process my thoughts and feelings by whittling them down into a clear and understandable form. Also, it’s nice to give quick updates to friends. Here were my tweets from today.
– Today I had to shove a feeding tube down Bowen’s throat while he and Sarah were crying. I trust the word “all” in Romans 8:28. I really do.
– You’ll be happy to know that the tension turned to laughter when all was said and done. God is faithful.
– Studying, praying through & trusting in the sovereignty of God over all things, including suffering, is essential to Christian joy and hope
– Listening to Timothy Keller http://sermons2.redeemer.com/sermons/your-plans-gods-plans